i never fall.

i used to be able to say that.

i don't really feel like i can say that
anymore and feel
that i am being
completely
honest.

this morning,
i tried to cross the road
and tripped...
apparently over the ROAD itself...
and landed
smack dab face down flat
on pope road.

on pope road at 7:30 am
which is very, very busy at that time...
similar to the 401 i would suggest
(the 401 is a road, right? somewhere in canada maybe? and busy?)

anyway.
face-plant in the middle of the street
in a dress
wearing my backpack
which is very heavy
because i am slightly insane
and carry 3 journals and a pencil case
WITH ALL MY PENS IN IT
and 3 cans of diet coke
and a package of pencil crayons
with me...everywhere.

so i try to
bounce back up
like "i'm ok!"
but the backpack
is weighing me down
and there are cars coming
and so i do some kind of mad
hermit-crab-turtle-y skittering crawling movement
to push myself backwards
and back to my feet.

and then i laugh instead of cry
and dash (witnesses may suggest the word limp rather than dash)
across the street with zero percent
of my dignity
intact.

the one bonus?
i got to break into the box of muppet bandaids
that emma gave me...
because i ripped my leggings
and scraped my knee
and the blood was sticking to my leggings.

and normally
i only get to use those bandaids
for papercuts
because
i never fall.