the poor girl fix

so....

our second-hand-fridge started rusting on the outside...
i'm not sure why
but it was just getting uglier and uglier.

but it worked just fine.

so...
i did the poor girl's fix and covered it with contact paper...

pretty happy with the result, if i do say so.
:)

monday morning, typing in the dark...

echoes of the weekend
still lingering
lots of sleep on saturday
{along with a migraine}
followed by lots of editing on sunday.
back to work today
but first
another appointment with a specialist
another round of tests

the cat ripped open
the chicken i forgot in the sink
last night
and left a chunk of bloody thigh
on the floor

i found of picture of our dog
mixed in with the wedding photos
i was editing
last night
and it put me over the edge
i never thought losing hobbes would feel this.
i never thought i would cry this hard
that i would feel this empty and guilty and
regretful for the times i said
i wish i didn't have a dog.

i wrote, "oh random picker, please make me a winner"...

and IT DID!

:)

i found out last night that i have won a spot on
Erin Wallace's A Love Supreme
eyes open:  creative photography e-course!!!

i am so excited!!!
it startes nov 1 which gives me lots of time to get
caught up on other things
and be ready to try something new...

you should check it out,
it looks like lots of fun!

thanks soulemama, who hosted the contest
and to erin
and to the random picker...you made my day!
:)

there are a number of things that I know right now...

i know that the chocolate brownies in the oven right
this very second
are making my mouth water and my stomach growl
even though
i just ate a huge thanksgiving meal at my parent's house.

i know that although i am feeling
totally overwhelmed with all the other things going on in my life right now
{lots of them good things, but overwhelming nonetheless}
i am also feeling an extremely hard gut-punching pull
towards finding time to notice me again...
to play, to look inside, to express, to relax, to create.

i know that when i look at blogs like this and this,
my heart burns and my stomach jumps and my fingers itch
to start, to delve back into that part of my life...
to write, to make things, to do things just for me again...
as much as i love doing weddings and photo sessions,
that can't be where all my creativity goes...

i know that being at my parent's house
again today for the first time in forever-it-feels
was competely and totally awesome.
watching my brothers playfight with 12-almost-13
and 17, too...just like when she was a kid
made me so unbelievably, unbearably happy...
it was good day, a day to be thankful for.