i always say that i am very positive about myself and my capabilities...
i believe in myself
i say yes
i try things
i put myself out there.
i think i am sure of myself and that i have a good sense of self.

so it surprised me yesterday
when i found myself
doubting my ability to take photos anymore.
feeling anxious and
not good enough.

i know what it was triggered by
i just don't know why i reacted so strongly.

i usually am pretty good at just shrugging
things off but this bothered me for most of the day.
it may just be that the euphoric high of doing something
new and receiving feedback and interest has altered
and that i need to adjust my own feelings...
i need to get back to doing it because i love it...
or not doing it.

and i can't imagine not doing it.

but maybe this is a natural progression,
maybe this is where i weed out the parts
i don't like, the sessions that don't excite me
and concentrate mainly on the ones that do.

or maybe.
this is also where i go back to the roots for me
regarding photography...the art side of it...
the ideas i originally had but did not act on
because i got suddenly so wrapped up in the
"business side" of it...

something to think about at 6:30 am.