It’s a brand new year.
I love a fresh start.
I love resolutions and goals and plans and lists.
And I especially love the sound of
2020.
It just sounds balanced and even and fair.
2019 was not an awful year for me.
It wasn’t the greatest, by any definition of the word,
but it could have been worse.
2019 forced me to grow and learn in ways
I wasn’t sure I was capable of.
It was a year of healing but, just for kicks,
the house decided to also make it the year it would
throw major temper tantrums
and force me to replace an oil tank, get the furnace fixed,
buy a new washer and dryer, cut down ALL the trees
in the back yard AND replace the roof.
Which sucked at the time, but I look at it now and think…
I’m still here. I’m still standing. And most days, I’m even still smiling.
And that feels pretty friggin’ good. :)
If you have been here before, you know I pick a word every January
to use as a bit of a compass for the rest of the year.
Last year, I chose unfold and, honestly, it was perfect.
I went into 2019 not sure how a lot of things were going to pan out…
I wasn’t sure I would be able to stay in the house after 2 financial advisors
told me that there was no way I would be able to do it on my own.
I wasn’t sure I could handle the house even if I did stay in it.
Also, I was dating but unsure if I was really ready for that either.
I was just really, really unsure of everything that I had once been certain of.
And my nature is to plan/list/mindmap/analyze my way through things
but I decided to just let this year unfold.
And that was the perfect decision. It gave me the flexibility
to put myself out there but also the safety net to pull back if I needed to.
No expectations. No set goals. Just take it as it comes.
The allowance to unfold served its need in 2019
but now…I am ready for more.
I think I have been quietly building a foundation for some bigger goals
and now it’s time to throw in the match
and ignite 2020.
I am ready mentally to push myself harder this year in some of the areas
that I have just been treading water in…mainly…on the creative side.
I have some big goals and plans and intentions for 2020.
Ignite just felt like the right amount of heat and excitement
and butterflies in my belly. I am kind of looking forward to 2020.
And thanks for coming along on my long winded, sometimes
overly scenic, slightly wordy no-map drive. I definitely appreciate your company. :)